


Me And You

by InsideTheSky



Series: Would You Believe Me If I Said I Didn't Need You? [2]
Category: Bandom, Panic! at the Disco, The Young Veins
Genre: M/M, RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-15
Updated: 2014-05-15
Packaged: 2018-01-24 21:09:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1617155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsideTheSky/pseuds/InsideTheSky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spencer finally gets round to contacting Jon again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Me And You

**Author's Note:**

> What am I doing, I don't really know. This counts as revision right?  
> Oh jeez, I think Linda and Cassie and Sarah are perfect for their husbands so please forgive me I do love them

_"It's been a while since I saw you_

_My head is higher than the clouds_

_and I am puzzled by the pieces"_

Jon's voice filtered through my speakers, alerting me to the fact I'd forgotten to put my headphones in.  I glanced towards the back of the bus, hoping Brendon hadn't heard.  We'd sort of avoided talking about the whole "Ryan-and-Jon-issue" for a couple of years, and I didn't want to be the one to bring it up now.  That was all.  It was nothing to do with me not wanting him to know I'd practically been stalking Jon.  I'd seen it all, the new songs, the LP (I couldn't listen to more than half of _Inside The Sky_ though).  I'd watched the breakup with Cassie unfold online, my fingers itching to pick up the phone and call him.  Instead I'd told myself that he probably had a new number and wasn't interested.  We hadn't talked in so long, infrequent texts having dried up long ago.  I didn't want to admit it, but I really missed him.  I missed Ryan too - he'd been my best friend for God's sake - but this was different.  I _loved_ Jon.

"I love him," I said aloud absently.

I stopped, about to change the song. _What?_ This was not the kind of realisation that should be overheard by sleeping band members at one in the morning.  What was I going to anyway?  Not for the first time, I wished I could talk to Ryan.  He'd talk in circles for a while then come up with some amazing plan that solved everything.  And Brendon....I couldn't tell Brendon this.

The bus door opened, making me jump, and slam the laptop shut, ripping the headphones out.  I grabbed my now-cold tea - not coffee, not anymore - and stared at the carpet.

"What's up?" Dallon said, coming in and sitting opposite me with far too much energy for what time it was.

Dallon.  A talented bassist and a good singer.  He fitted in well, without trying to fill Their shoes.  He'd understand, but he'd probably suggest talking to Brendon, and I wasn't sure I was up for that conversation.  Not yet, anyway.

"Nothing, I can't sleep.  Are they still going out there?" I inclined my head towards the door, meaning the impromptu end-of-tour party going on that Brendon and I opted out of.

"Oh, yeah.  Ken is hilariously drunk, I can't wait for tomorrow." he grinned back.  "But are you sure you're alright?  Your moody blue eyes could have come straight out of a chick flick." he continued, his expression sober.

"What?" I tossed a cushion at him.  "Shut up."

He batted his eyelashes at me then stood up.  "I'm gonna go to bed.  Is Sleeping Beauty back there?"  Meaning Brendon.

"Yeah."

"Excellent." he said with a wicked smile.

"Night," I said, not wanting to know what he was planning.

"Night."

I sat there for a few minutes.  The laptop had shut down, but I'd downloaded the songs onto my iPod.  I could go listen to them in my bunk.  Dumping the mug in the sinks, I went to bed and waited for sleep.

*****

The next night had much the same routine, only changing a week later when Dallon stayed on the tour bus.  Brendon was meant to be sleeping and resting his voice, but we could hear the sound of his laptop keyboard and he excitedly wrote or searched for something.  Dallon made two cups of tea and brought them over.  He handed me one then stared, unblinking, at me while I rested the mug on the laptop.  It was unnerving.

"Thanks." I said.

"Spence."

"What?" I replied, a but scared.  Sometimes he loomed over people much like he was doing now, and I'd heard what he'd done to Pete for a laugh.  He wasn't just too damn tall, he enjoyed it.

"Do you want to tell me what's going on?  What's wrong?"

"What do you mean?  How do you know anything's wrong?"

"You haven't been your usual lovely, bossy self," he looked concerned.

I didn't know what to say.  He was more astute than I thought.  Add "dangerously clever" to "tall, scary lunatic."

"I'm not bossy!" I said defensively.

Dallon raised an eyebrow.  I raised mine higher.  We stayed like that for a few minutes until I sighed and looked away.

"Fine."

He took a drink, reminding me that my own was cooling.  I drank some, trying to buy some time.  He waited patiently, settling in against the seat.

And somehow I found myself telling him everything while he nodded and finished his tea.  When I'd done, he set his cup down and looked at me.

"Well, my young grasshopper, we have much work to do."

"Really?" I said, indicating his words.

"I wanted to sound like a wise advice-giver." he mumbled.  "Okay, well look, you have to take baby steps, alright?  You could send him a text?"  I shook my head.  "A tweet? Or an email, you can get his email, right?"

I shrugged.

"Okay, I'll leave you to it.  Good luck."  He paused before he got to the bunks.  "It'll be okay, don't worry."

I gave him a grimace that could be interpreted as a smile and he left.  Turning to the laptop, I loaded up twitter and typed in his name.  iamjonwalker.  I smiled a little.  I clicked on his website and scrolled until I found the email address.  A copy and paste into the email left me with my hands hovering over the keys, unsure of what to write.  I hadn't changed my email address, he'd know it was me and I didn't know whether to go for casual.  Did we still count as friends?  Probably not.  What did I type in the subject line?? "Hi."  That looked stupid, but it'd have to stay.  Now what was I supposed to say?  Something about catching up.  What if he just deleted the email?  I erased the text and started again, and by 3am I had an email that I was, if not happy, then okay with.  I sent it then decided to go to bed.  I didn't want to spend the whole night refreshing the browser like a teenager.

I was in my bunk when I realised 3am was far too late (early?) to send an email, and worse, emails were time stamped.  He'd know I sent it in the early hours of the morning.  I groaned and cursed under my breath.  I was resigned to spending the night staring at the empty bunk above, but eventually sleep caught up to my racing mind.

I woke up to the smell of coffee, and for one aching moment, it felt like 2006 again.  I got up and dressed, then walked slowly to the lounge.  Brendon and Kenneth were drinking coffee and laughing about something, which was totally a good omen, right?  Brendon caught my eye and smiled, looking happier than ever.  If he was over it, I wasn't going to bother him.  I took a bottle of water out of the fridge and helped myself to someone's toast.  Trying to appear nonchalant, I sat at the table and switched on the laptop.  No one had noticed how nervous I was, and my hands weren't even shaking.  I held my breath and logged into my email.

One new email.  Oh my God.

**you, Jon Walker (2)    Re: Hi**

I didn't want to open it.  Dallon walked past, and seeing me at the computer, looked at me expectantly.  I nodded briefly, then returned to the screen.  I glanced at the time it was sent.  3:30 am.  That was weird.  He'd been awake too.  I frowned, telling myself to stop stalling.  Clicking on the email, I scanned it with trepidation.  Then I stopped.  He hadn't told me to get lost.  The email was friendly and suggested meeting up sometime.  He'd included his new mobile number (see, I knew I was right) and said I should contact him soon.  I saved his number and breathed a sigh of relief.  Well, he didn't hate me.

I put my phone away and joined the others.  We were hitting a shopping centre then going out for lunch, so I decided not to text Jon until we got back to the bus.

*****

"Brendon, those shoes don't go with anything you own," I commented.

Dallon looked up, grinning.  I ignored him and picked up a different pair.  "Try these on."  Which only made Dallon smile wider.

"Shut up," I warned him.

"I didn't say anything, bossy boots."  He pretended to not see my answering glare and skipped off delightedly, presumably to find extra-extra-extra long sparkly trousers that would only have to be taken in.  Skinny bastard.

When he and Brendon had finished trying to outdo each other with their "catwalk" in the changing rooms, we went to the nearest music shop, where we ended up waiting for Kenneth to decide between two almost indistinguishable records before we could find a Pizza Hut.  With the four of us squeezing into a booth that was not designed for the ridiculously tall (we all know who I was talking about) there wasn't much elbow room.  As I ate my pizza and watched Kenneth catch meatballs in his mouth, egged on by Brendon, I wondered what Jon was doing.  Despite what we said, we hadn't kept in touch with either of them for a long while and it was hard sometimes not to miss them.

With that in mind, as soon as we were back on the bus - two more days until we got home - I went to sit in my bunk and started composing a text.

_Hi, it's Spencer_

That worked, didn't it?

I waited an agonising twenty minutes and I was ready to turn my phone off and go out somewhere when it buzzed on the pillow, where I'd dumped it.

" _Hey._ " Was that it?  What was I supposed to say now?

_How have you been?_

Well that was a stupid question, I though as I sent it.

Two minutes later and I had a reply.  I silently praised the mobile reception of whatever town we were currently in.

" _Not too bad, how about you?_ "

This wasn't as awkward as I had thought it might have been.  But then it was Jon, and he'd always had a knack for making people feel at ease.

_I'm okay.  Been better._

It took ten minutes for him to reply this time.  " _You haven't been talking to Ryan, have you?_ "

Okay this part was awkward.  I guiltily texted back _No.._ , wishing I'd made more of an effort.

His response was swift.

" _Oh, okay, never mind.  So what's up?_ "

_Okay? Nothing really, we're headed back to Vegas._

" _Cool.  I'm in Vegas at the moment._ "

Was that an observation or an invitation?  But before I could think of a reply, he texted again: " _Do you want to meet up?_ "

Okay, that was clearer.  Sure I wanted to!  We'd be back in a couple of days, by Thursday, and this was a perfect opportunity.  I asked him where and he named a place that we always used to go to after tour, before he left for Chicago.  Brendon and I hadn't been there in years.  When I said that was alright, he said he had to go, so I said goodbye and sat back.  I felt like I'd run a race - I was exhausted and sweating, but I felt better than I had in a long time.  Now I had to figure out a way to tell him.  I smiled.   _Something's gonna happen._

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry about all the texting, it's doing my head in but I can't figure out how to make it work, it's 4am but I want to post this before my biology exam
> 
> JWalk reference at the end


End file.
